Be a ‘Ronaldo’

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Simply said, the industry will introduce you to three types of influencers before it kicks you off into retirement.

The first type of an influencer is the Lingard. This influencer is soft in appearance and charming by presentation. Almost all the times, you will try to look at his impact within a team but not see any. Yet, he will always be present at live chats, dominate the number of tweets on trends, have a live story on IG and while you may get tired of seeing him pop up on your timeline, he doesn’t stop being active. Some of us unfollow them only to find ourselves following them back all over again.

The second type is the Sergio Ramos. Rough by definition. Looking at their timelines, you will not remember the last time they used their actual picture for the profile. It’s a cartoon, a gif, a random figure or just something cynical. They pop up at conversations with unrelated topics to the subject, share links to news pages and funny videos. Then worst of all, they mention your handle over and over again after every tweet.

They will tag you on an IG picture just to capture your attention. At times send you a WhatsApp text then delete it. They are just rough – to you, to your emotions, your abilities and your audience. “Ever wished you could log in to someone’s account and delete the account without them knowing?” That’s the feeling they leave you with.

The Sergio Ramos are the same type of influencers who extend the game to your girlfriends’ DM or send sweet emogys’ to your boyfriends’ pictures. “I miss you” or even “chilling with the people that make life beautiful.”

They play rough everywhere; Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, DM, name it. You see them taking part in an active conversation and wish they run out of bundles.

The third type of influencer is me. If I read an interesting quote in the morning, I will share it with my friends in that WhatsApp group as if I am the original composer. “Morning guys, quote of the day!” then I will wait and see who will read and even respond to it. A small joke by King’ang’i on classic in the morning and I will act up like am the only one who heard it.

I will see an emotional message on your status and assume it’s directed at me. I will want to find out if you are okay. And I will insist. “It’s just a status.” You will tell me but still I will insist. I will open up my IG account, not post anything but randomly like new images from my friends. I will check your stories before I even get out of bed. I will go through some of your tweets, like a few or even retweet then I will receive that “dear customer…is below 2mb” message, and I will be done for the day.

If I come across people talking about the cost of living, I will grumble like “they are making millions in profits yet they can’t lower the cost of data! They are just stealing from us.”

“They? Who are you talking about?”

“They. These…these people who take over every market they get into.”

Mbai. There is Wifi everywhere. Plus fibre is really affordable.”

“That’s the language they all use! Wait until you subscribe and they start sending you renewal messages.”

I love the Ronaldos’. If they is any type of influencer you can be, be them. Some I follow online and offline. Their lives talk to me. The way they do what they do impacts my life. I want to tweet like them, respond to their posts. I want to feel am part of their conversations. They will share an event and I will want to attend. I will even borrow money from family and friends just to buy airtime and keep following them.

I smile when they talk on TV interviews about how success is not all about money yet they pocket thousands from their social media channels.

They simply make me want to change the way I dress, the way I talk and even the way I describe myself online. They make me feel like am existing while they are up there living. Which to a large extend make me wonder, “If we are all created in the image and likeness of God, why then would he allow you to unfollow me?

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